There are so many things wrong with me I’ve become a burden to my family. What you may not know is…I am a former chain smoker. Although I quit 3 years ago…well…I continue having lung spasms…great difficulty breathing…walking is near impossible,each step is painful & stiff. 5 times,or more,I was taken to ER & I nearly died. My lungs will never fully heal…I’ll have spasms the rest of my life. I’ll never be truly healthy.
I’ve spent the past 19 years binging on alcohol beverages nightly…&…10 years chain smoking…eating foods you wouldn’t feed to your dog. It has seemed like the only way to endure emotional & mental abuse…& poverty. I don’t know how to live my life…maybe I don’t want to continue a life that never changes…no improvement,no advancement…the same for years…nothing new,nothing different,no matter what I do.