When I Turned 50

I have been in deep depression since turning 50. Unable to snap out of it…well…I gave up my hobbies,passions,& lost interest in my favorite things. All I want to do is cry & sleep. 

The wrinkles are beginning…the age spots…can’t lose weight…noticing gray hair in my hair brush…my youth & beauty have faded…my dreams make me cry…dreams I’ve carried in my heart since I was a teenager…sicknesses,pains…regrets & what ifs. 

There’s the Need For Speed games & other games I used to play & collect…& now to play those games would make me cry & mourn for my youth…reliving a past I will never live again…when my passions were red hot & my dreams were bright as the noon-day sun. My games are collecting dust on a shelf in my bedroom…while I work with my dreams to awaken them…while thinking,it won’t be the same when I’m old & gray. Will that dream house & that sports car matter in my old age?

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About Brenda Cooper

I've been a student & user of the Laws Of Attraction for over 30 years. I remain poor,a hermit,& abused, I am in my 50s & my husband is in his 60s. I have 2 young adult sons. Blogging is my therapy. My grandest dream is to move to Green Cove Springs Florida,
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