Even a slight booze buzz makes me forget I have mental illness & makes me feel normal & sane. Its the only time I feel normal. Its the time when I feel brave & confident. Its like I can do anything without anxiety & depression. At these times I wish I could feel this way all of the time. Its the time when I can talk & feel big. I wish it would never ever end. These magical feelings keep me boozing nightly. Its the only times when I feel sane & normal,strong,courageous & confident. The boozing allows me to sleep through the night.